but when my brethren stand aloof— when they begin to faint and endeavour to retard my progress and enterprise then I feel to mourn but am no less determined to prosecute my task, being confident that altho my earthly friends may fail and even turn against me, yet my heavenly father will bear me off triumphant. However I hope that even in , their are some who do not make a man an [“]offender for a word” but are disposed to stand forth in defence of righteousness and truth and attend to every duty enjoined upon them and who will have wisdom to direct them against any movement or influence calculated to bring confusion and disorder into the camp of Israel, and to discern between the spirit of truth and the spirit of error.
It would be gratifying to my mind to see the saints in flourish, but think the time has not yet come and I assure you it never will until a different order of things be established and a different spirit be manifested. When confidence is restored, when pride shall fall and every aspiring mind be clothed with humility as with a garment and selfishness give place to benevolence and charity, and a united determination to live by every word which proceedeth out of the mouth of the Lord is observable, then and not till then can peace and order, and love prevail
It is in consequence of aspiring men that has been forsa ken. How frequently has your humble servant been envied in his office by such characters who endeavoured to raise themselves to power at my expense, and seeing it impossible to do so, resorted to foul slander and abuse and other means to effect my overthrow; such characters have ever been the first to cry out against the , and publish their faults and foibles to four winds of heaven.
I cannot forget the treatment I received in the house of my friends, these things continually roll across my mind and cause me much sorrow of heart, and when I think that others who have lately come into the should be led to instead of to this place by Babbit , and having their confidence in the Authorities lessened by such observations as he () has thought propper to make, as well as hearing all the false reports and exaggerated accounts of our enemies, I must say that I feel grieved in spirit, and cannot tolerate such proceedings neither will I, but will endeavour to disabuse the minds of the saints and break down all such unhallowed proceedings. [p. 160]